I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize