you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
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You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
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I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize