How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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