Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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