doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Randomize
