Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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