Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
so let's talk penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
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