Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
