at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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