I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Randomize