my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
