Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
