Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
