Its about making memories worth repressing
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Randomize
