So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
