My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
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