I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Randomize
