Multitasking record: pooping whilst putting on shoes and cleaning ear with q-tip. All while texting.
Update: fell off toilet, one shoe on, q-tip still in ear. Not a pro.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
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