I'm gonna have a badass scar
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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