While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I love having hate sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize