You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
