Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Small penises have feelings too.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
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