so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
this boner is exhausting
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Randomize
