Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
My penis needs a shock collar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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