No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
