just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I'm going to jail i love you
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Randomize
