I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
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