I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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