Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Blood and glitter go together right?
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
