It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Randomize
