Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
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