Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
Actions speak louder than pants.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize