things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize