His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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