Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.