how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
