and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
