My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize