best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
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