god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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