sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this must be what syphilis tastes like
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize