True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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