i jhust puked up my retainher.
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
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