im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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