I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Randomize
