it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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