Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
