that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
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