they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
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There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
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Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
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