After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Randomize
