We won't sleep together?
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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