i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Just puked most of my soul out..
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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